When she was 22, Maisie’s mom was diagnosed with Glioblastoma. In this podcast episode, Maisie shares what both the journey of walking alongside her mom through diagnosis and what life after loss has looked like. She has found community with others who “get it” at Inheritance of Hope, and encourages others to do the same.
When Maisie left for school in the middle of January after Christmas break, her mother seemed fine to her but sad that two of her kids had to go back to college.
Eventually, her family realized something was wrong with her mother when she FaceTimed them with damp washcloths on her forehead to help with chronic headaches and she couldn’t look directly in the camera. While driving, her mother’s “reflexes were delayed. So she was not stopping right at the stop sign, all that stuff, which of course on the road isn’t necessarily safe because it causes everybody confusion, like ‘what is this person doing?’”
Around the end of February, her father took her mother to the ER where doctors discovered that she had a mass in her frontal lobe “and then had scheduled surgery 3 days later to remove the tumor or at least what they could of it because it was in the brain, you know, an important part of a person, right?”
College life with a terminally ill parent
In March, doctors officially gave Maisie’s mother a 15 to 18 month life expectancy which “unfortunately she did not surpass that as she had passed away January of that next year.”
During school days, Maisie would receive messages from her father about the different appointments he took her mother to and how her mother was struggling with cognitive symptoms from her tumor growing back after removal surgery. “For someone in college, as you can imagine, it’s just like really hard knowing that they’re in Virginia and I was 40 minutes away at school and just, you know, really hard hearing all the news.” Maisie said. “My mom, she was like, not only was she my mom, but she was my best friend. I’m away at school having all my classes and school work, but also knowing that she’s back home sick and all for me was just very difficult.”
When Maisie’s mother became sick and passed away, her family members from both her mother and father’s sides banded together to create an email group chat for family updates all around the country. Church friends also got involved and showed up “in this time of need with meals and coming over and spending time with my mom if it was her friends or whatever. So yeah, just being able to see through this trial and suffering and the anticipatory grief.”
Hope in new hobbies
Getting involved in Inheritance of Hope’s vast community has also helped Maisie cope with loss. Though she eventually became too busy to attend the young adult meetings because of how hectic adulthood became, she started volunteering with the Hope@Home™ program where it could fit into her schedule and “once my mom passed, I wanted to volunteer and my commute was like 5 minutes. I’m walking over to my computer, opening it up, and turning it on.” Then she eventually became an active member of the Just Show Up Book Club where as the name suggests, participants aren’t pressured to read or even know the chosen book prior to attending. They just need to show up to the online meetings and they’ll be welcomed with open arms.
“As I’ve joined those calls, I’ve definitely read books that I may not have initially picked up. Maybe for obvious reasons–they’re a harder read because they’re about suffering and all of this. There have definitely been things that I’ve either learned or that have like jumped out at me. Right now we’re going through Kristen Milligan’s book and she says that she was ‘God’s favorite child.’ Just knowing that I’m His favorite child and I’m a child of God and remembering that no matter what difficulties I went through or am going to go through in life, He’s always there walking beside me even when it may feel like He’s gone astray. I love that quote and I mean her book is so amazing.”
Maisie still continues to be involved with Inheritance of Hope and hopes to honor her mother’s legacy through volunteer work.
Hear more of Lauren’s story on the Inheritance of Hope Podcast. Listen now >>
Kennedy Owens a Storytelling Intern at Inheritance of Hope. She is currently a sophomore at Florida Southern College with a major in advertising and public relations, and is an active participant on her school campus as the Event Coordinator for the Young Adults Self Advocates club and Brand Manager for the school’s radio station The Hiss. She enjoys all things writing-related and likes to serve her community the best she can.
Tessa and her children at a Hope Hub™ gathering