Do you remember the “Choose Your Own Adventure” books from years ago? You would read a few pages, reach a fork in the road and have to make a decision. “If you decide to open the mysterious door, turn to page 42. If you decide to run away, turn to page 87.”
Life is full of choices. There are decisions to be made, many times with multiple solutions. Sometimes wise decisions are made. Other times—well, you cannot go back to page 42 if you did not choose wisely.
You have been placed into a situation with terminal illness, and many pages of your story have been filled with a journey that you would have never chosen for yourself—or for anyone. However, in the midst of these chapters of your life, you have also been given the opportunity to make decisions to shape how your story will unfold. While you may not necessarily have control about how your story eventually ends, you can still make meaningful choices about how you live out the story you have been given.
This is where Biblical Hope comes into the mix, which involves actively waiting with complete trust and dependency on God, filled with eternal Truth found in the Bible, found only in a living Jesus Christ. It is one matter to comprehend Biblical Hope, but embracing it can be a different decision altogether.
What does it look like to actually embrace this idea of biblical, living hope in the midst of terminal illness?
Here are three typical scenarios:
Scenario 1: The Window Watch
You sit by the living room window. Outside, you watch the neighbors packing their car for a carefree vacation. They move quickly. They aren’t counting steps and won’t be waiting on slow elevators just to get from floor to floor. Your world is vastly different from theirs.
- If you choose to turn to the Path of Comparison, read below:
Comparing your life situation to the life situations of others allows bitterness to creep into your heart. You subtly grow angry with your neighbors, with others, and even with God. The blessings of your life are overlooked. You close the blinds, feeling totally alone.
· If you choose to turn to the Path of Gratitude, turn your heart to Philippians 4:
Gratitude is the harder path, but it is the best path. Finding things to thank God for does not come naturally. That kind of posture is learned. It involves slowly releasing control, accepting your storyline, and choosing to be grateful for what you have been given. This is what the Apostle Paul references when he writes,
Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. (Philippians 4:11-12)
Scenario 2: The Unanswered Cry
You have dropped to your knees. You have wept. You have begged God for healing, but the latest scan shows the disease is still marching forward. The prayers you have prayed seem to have gone unanswered.
- If you choose the Trap of “Because,” read below:
Because God has not answered your prayer for healing, then it is easy to conclude that He must not care. God must be unloving. Or maybe God simply cannot heal. You begin to think that you don’t have enough faith. Prayer, then, has no power, and you just give up.
· If you choose the Triumph of “Even If,” turn your heart to Daniel 3:
You made the declaration that God hears your cry and is able to heal. But even if God doesn’t heal you, He is still your God. You will still seek to serve Him, rest in Him, and remain faithful to an ever-faithful God.
Your attention turns to the response of three young men when faced with trusting God in a life and death decision:
If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God whom we serve is able to save us. He will rescue us from your power, Your Majesty. But even if he doesn’t, we want to make it clear to you, Your Majesty, that we will never serve your gods or worship the gold statue you have set up.” (Daniel 3:17-18)
Scenario 3: The Bathroom Mirror
You catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, and your heart sinks. Your hair is gone, your skin is pale, and your clothes fit differently. The illness has taken a devastating physical toll. You look like a stranger to yourself.
- If you choose the Lens of the Seen, read below:
You fix your eyes on only what you can see in the mirror. Discouragement, sadness and hopelessness follow. All of life just seems futile. Especially now.
- If you choose the Lens of the Unseen, turn your heart to 2 Corinthians 4:
You fix your gaze on Jesus, who was beaten until He was unrecognizable. Yet he stepped out of the tomb with a resurrected body, giving you hope beyond the grave. Again, the Apostle Paul speaks into this situation with the reminder that what we see is temporary:
That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So, we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever. (2 Corinthians 4:16-18)
Whether you are sitting by the window, wrestling with an unanswered prayer, or staring into a bathroom mirror, the invitation remains the same: choose Living Hope. Embracing this hope gives us a framework to handle the realities of terminal illness without losing our faith.
This posture of embracing your story with biblical hope is encapsulated by this quote by author and pastor John Piper:
“Occasionally weep deeply over the life you hoped would be. Grieve the losses. Then wash your face. Trust God. And embrace the life you have.” (https://www.desiringgod.org/embrace-the-life-god-has-given-you)
As you reflect on embracing living hope in the shadows of terminal illness, here are some thoughts to consider:
- What triggers comparison in my life? What causes me to not choose gratitude?
- Fill in the blanks with whatever situations come to mind:
- “Even if _______________, I will still serve God.”
- “Even if _______________, I will serve God.”
- “Even if _______________, I will serve God.”
- What percentage of the situations you face every single day are temporary?
- What percentage of the situations you face every single day are eternal?
A Closing Prayer
Heavenly Father,
I realize that you are the Author of my story. Right now, what is being written on the pages of my life is painful. While my story is not something that I would have written for myself, you have an ultimate plan and purpose.
Forgive me for those times when I am discontent, or blame You for not listening, or focus on only what I can see with my eyes. These are natural responses, and I want to have supernatural responses which are rooted in knowing You.
Please fix my eyes firmly on Jesus. One day He will make everything right and whole. Until then, please pour out your grace on me as I weep over my losses, wash my face, and embrace my story.
Amen
Brad Neese is a pastor, teacher and leader dedicated to aligning people to the truth, relevancy and everyday implications of the Gospel. He graduated from Cedarville University and Dallas Theological Seminary, spending over two decades shepherding congregations and developing church leaders. He currently lives in Irmo, South Carolina, with his wife, Crystal, and their four children.